Link to Watch Arlene’s Interview on Hour of Power

Here’s the link to see my guest interview on the Hour of Power that aired on May 31st.  Just click on “watch” to see my interview.  Please feel free to pass it along to any women who have experienced miscarriages and I hope it will be an encouragement to them!

How to Explain a Miscarriage to Your Young Child

I am 13 weeks along and baby is doing just fine, so I’m happy that this post isn’t about my current pregnancy.  But my 4 year old son said something to me that I just had to share with you.

He said, “Mom, I hope our baby pops.”

Last fall, I miscarried at about 8 weeks.  I wasn’t sure how to explain this to my 4 year old.  We were sitting at the breakfast table and I breathed a prayer to God.  “Give me wisdom and show me how to tell my son.”  At that moment, I looked at the microwave popcorn we had been snacking on.  That was it!

I told my son, “Look at this popcorn.  See how most of the kernels become popcorn, but some of it just stays as kernels?  I don’t really know why some kernels pop and some don’t.  There’s not really a good reason.  Well, you know how mommy has a baby inside?  Well, my baby didn’t pop.  We didn’t do anything wrong, it’s just the way it turned out.”

My son thought about it for a moment.  I showed him the kernels again, comparing the popped corn to the unpopped corn.  The explanation was good enough for him.  From time to time afterwards, he would ask me, “Why didn’t our baby pop?”  To which I replied something like, “I don’t know.  Some things pop and others don’t.” 

So if you ever need a way to explain miscarriage to a young child, think of this popcorn story.  I hope it helps you share your sad news with your little one.  And remember, there are some things we don’t understand (like why DON’T all those kernels pop in the bag?) but God will give us the grace we need when we need it.

Miscarriage to Miracle

Every Christmas, I must remember Angel Rose…and smile.

In 2005, I was pregnant with a remarkable little girl at Christmastime.  We found out at Thanksgiving that she had defects that would cause her heart to stop beating in a matter of days or weeks.  But it was Christmas and she was still fighting.  Her little heart stopped beating after Christmas. 

What a strange New Years that was; delivering a baby at 26 weeks that had passed away.  Our hearts will filled with sadness but also with hope that in the New Year, God would do a miracle of healing and restoration in our lives. 

And He did!  On April 7, the day that would have been Angel’s birthday, we found out we were pregnant with a little girl.  Noelle Joy was born the very next Christmas. 

Christmas 2005, we were carrying a child that would die.  Christmas 2006, we were carrying a healthy child in our arms. 

So every Christmas, I remember that God is always with us – both when times are terribly tough and when times are great.  Here’s a video about my miscarriage that was produced by Turning Point with Dr. David Jeremiah. 

And here’s a picture of my miracle, Noelle Joy age 2, who’s showing me what she wants for Christmas!

Rain

Yesterday when I woke up, I felt tired, headache-y, and very Eeyore like.  I dragged around the house in the morning.  My husband offered to watch the kids if I wanted to go to the gym.  I didn’t want to go but way down deep inside, knew it would be good for you.  So I went, but don’t think I’m superwoman or anything.  Since I just miscarried last week, I’m taking it easy.  I did 15 minutes on an elliptical machine and 15 minutes of light weights. 

While at the gym, I listened to a podcast by Joel Osteen, who is great to listen to if you ever feel down.  He was talking about building a rain storm of God’s blessing over your life.  How do you get God’s blessings to rain down on you?  He said that happens when you choose to praise God.  Whenever you say “thank you God,” it’s like putting water in the clouds above and after awhile the clouds can’t help but burst with blessings upon your life.  

It sure made a lot of sense to me.  Instead of thinking, “Why did I have a miscarriage?” I’m trying to think, “God thank you for the lessons you can teach me through this unborn child.”  And “Thank you for the children you’ve given” and “thank you for your love through all seasons.”  With praise, I’m finding my heart getting a little lighter each day although as I said before, I feel a lot like Eeyore these days from Winnie the Pooh. 

But guess what happened yesterday night in sunny San Diego?  It rained.  And rained.  And I smiled in my bed because I thought of that rain cloud of praise falling down on me.  God’s blessings are here and are coming in the future!